Spanking: childhood punishment, or naughty sexual kink?
The answer is obviously both — but today, we’ll be discussing the latter. It’s easy to see why spanking has become such a hit. Erotic spanking can take you on a journey of sensations from warm and gentle, to thrilling spikes of pleasure and orgasmic release. It can seem a little daunting at first, but with the right technique and practice, it can create the sexual intensity that you and your partner crave. So, what are you waiting for?!
Here are five tips on how to engage in spanking.
Choose who is Dominant and who is Submissive
This may sound obvious, but you need to pick your roles. The one who is in charge will be the dom and the one who is receiving will be sub.
Now it is important never to try this without firstly discussing it with your partner. The roles you take will be dependent on what you both find exciting. Remember, both partners have to want it. This isn’t a case of doing it until the receiver likes it. Everyone has to be engaged and enthusiastic from the start.
Pick a Safe Word
This is vital. You will need a word that lets the dom know the sub has had enough or is in pain or discomfort. The word should be out of step with what is actually happening. For example, “please stop, it hurts” might well be something that is used in the role play naturally. On the other hand, “door knob” is something that would never be said and is more likely to bring you both back into the moment.
Start off Light and Go Harder
You may have been wanting to try this for a while, but after waiting this long surely you can wait a little longer? Don’t rush in – if your partner is not aroused, a firm smack on the bottom is likely to hurt more than anything else. The excitement has to be built up, beginning with light slaps, and ending up harder.
Start by gently massage the area/s in a circular motion and squeeze the skin to increase blood flow. Then try some light swats with the palm of your hand until the area is a rosy pink colour – this means the bum is ready for a firmer spanking.
It’s also important to observe their reaction and go from there; did they respond with positive noises? Did their breathing change? Are they biting their lip? etc. The answer to these questions should help you figure out if your partner is ready to take it up a notch.
Talk Dirty
The most uncomfortable form of spanking is often the one that is done in complete silence. It really should be mixed in with a bit of dirty talk or role play. Let the sub know how bad they have been, and how they need to be punished. If your partner is being submissive, you can also throw in “you like it rough” or “is that what you want?”
It certainly beats you both sat there like a pair of mutes looking like you don’t really know what is going on…
Experiment with Variations
For many, spanking alone isn’t going to be enough. Experiment with different sensations to see what gets them going. This can include caressing the bottom at varying strengths, speeding up and slowing down the rhythm, or playing with other areas of your partner’s body in between spanks.
If you really want to step outside of the box, then you could try incorporating spanking into sexual roleplay. Start with the most obvious cliche — she’s been a naughty school girl, and you’re her teacher that has to “punish” her. Try spanking over the knee, stooped over a chair, or across a table.
For those feeling a little kinky, get your partner on all fours, or try with their hands tied. Keep in mind that the muscles and skin are stretched whilst on all fours, so the sensations are much more intense! Mixing things up makes it exciting and will really turn your partner on.